freedom

freedom i seek,
will be granted tomorrow,
free from love life,
feels good.

freedom i seek,
will finally be reality,
being free from tension, gotten by study,
feels nice.

the foundation has just ended,
while this is only the real stepping stone,
of my life,
being free for 3 months,
feels good anyway.

maintenance

this blog will be closed down from 8 nov 2009 and will be reopen on 12 nov 2009.

sorry for the inconvenience.

reclaim path of life

returning,
to the path of my life,
after being lost somewhere,
i've found back me.

path of my life,
was reclaimed,
after so much of obstacle,
that happened to me.

the goal of my life,
was aimed,
to be successful in life,
by working on my strong point.

every small part of life,
was like a little game to me,
there's win and loses,
i had, definitely lost in a few part of the game.

i've lost in love,
however experiences were gain through loses,
a wise man once said,
we have to lose once in a while, in order to be successful later.

getting the hang of this game,
i've reclaim, found back my talents,
makes my life more meaningful,
this, had eventually reveal the real me, in myself.

trust

few years back,
trust towards friend was destroyed,
knowing that the best part of me was to do everything myself,
having a friend was just part of life,
known as social skill.

few year back,
i thought i had best friend forever,
however, that thought was wrong,
everything screwed up,
long story.

recently,
when i was about to heal,
trust towards friend,
crushed by a big pile of stone,
knowing for life,
i would not have best friends forever.

scientifically proven.

the least expected

the least expected was, i was rejected last night 6 november 2009 11:15pm,
wahaha, wasnt so bad, aint sad, infact, feeling kinda happy.
first reason was maybe im free from this burden??
haha, might be, oh well, at least now i know i can concentrate better on my studies.
well, promised my self she would be the last 1, and i would never look at other girls or even trying to hit on them until after i grad from uni, which is about 6 years.

haha, everything will be back to normal i guess, i dont feel sad, that was the least expected..

the process of making this blog

in the process of making this blog filled with poems(thats wat ppl said),
theres been lotsa inspiration, it was said that poems was written due to the feelings that an writer posses when writing a poem.

well, i understand how this goes, cuz all my feelings were expressed out through poems,
not all was well written, but i did gain some inspiration when writting it.
of course, i did not expect me to even write an poem because, owh... i hate literature,
but wow?? love has reveal a small part of me which i did not discovered yet till then, writting poems. it was cool.

okay, so through this poem, i might expressed overwhelmly overwhelming until its kinda obvious who that person was, hahaha.

alright, so, just wanted to tell u that, if you are reading this(and the person i mention is you). okay, just wanted to tell you that this blog actually was nothing, it was only just too expressed my feelings instead of keeping inside my heart. it does not have any other motive.

so then, if u wanted to reject me, because you know who you are and u dont feel the same way, haha. its alright, i dont want our friendship to end because of this. just reject, i could understand, i dont mind. haha. just make it quick. obviously i would appreciate a chance, but love cant be force. if you dont have any feelings for me, just make it quick then, reject only.

thx for reading.

Assuming

Assuming you know who you are,
i felt, our distance is getting further and further,
i dont know why?

everything that had happened,
linked,
does not side me.

i felt, u had treat me differently,
maybe was thinking too much,
but i felt sad,
dissappointed, even,
feel like bursting out into tears.

frequently, i asked my self,
did i made a right decision liking you?
answer, that i received,
was, i did not had a choice,
because i had fell for you without realising.

Couldn't hold back

my love for you,
is always getting stronger and stronger,
soon, i could not hold back my feelings for you.
i really do hope you could give me a chance,
to accept me.

thinking too much,
hoping very much that ur heart, belongs to me.
this high hope, has caused jealousy to be taken place easily.
however,
no regrets, loving you.

suffering, feeling pain,
but still hoping you will find your true love,
is worth after all,
because i love you very much.

You attracted my attention like a magnet

law of attraction,
is what i believe love would bring up to.

you have definitely attracted me in several ways,
your laughter,
your smile,
your tenderness,
your cuteness.

the presence of you laughing and smiling,
around me,
makes me feel happy,
the moment i am sad, your laughter, your smile,
makes you even cuter, that could cheer me up,
you are the only 1 i seek whenever im sad or down,

because of you,
i found out more about love,
how to be loved,
and how to love.
all the happiness that you have brought into my life,
have made me love you even more.

maybe you had not realise,
but i hope to be with you every moment,
every second.

Unexpectedly

unexpectedly,
i fell for you,
without realising it.

unexpectedly,
i realise,
you are everything to me.

unexpectedly,
i felt deeply in my heart,
i could not lose you.

unexpectedly,
the missing pieces in my heart,
is you.

unexpectedly,
my life would only be perfect,
with your presence in my life.

Wishing You're Mine

Wishing you’re mine,
Feelings, developing in my heart, hard to turn back,
Yet I am still unable to move forward.

Wishing you’re mine,
Because the sweet smile of yours,
Stole my heart away.

Wishing you’re mine,
Because the happiness aura of yours,
Make me feel lively.

Wishing you’re mine,
Because the bedazzling eyes of yours,
Have caught me mesmerise.

Wishing you’re mine,
Because your tenderness that draws closer to me,
Make me love you even more.

Life,
Is barely even fair,
Cause god had spend more time on you,
To make you even more perfect.

A terrible day

a morning day light shines the world,
it was suppose to be a beautiful day,
the flow went smooth, until rain drop comes,
subconscious instinct,
predict it will be a terrible day.

out of the blue,
dark aura revolves around me,
feeling confused,
strong emotional feeling surrounds me.

hoping to break out from these feelings,
but,
the mood had been broken for the day,
only thing i had in mind, was you,

wanting to tell you the truth,
but,
fear strucks, afraid that you would reject me,

strong feeling,
tells me that,
it is about time,
to tell you the truth, that i fell for you.

Heart beat

your smile,
is everything,

u make me smile,
everytime ur by my side,

my heart beat,
gets quicker,
everytime im with you,

just when im being drawn to the darker side,
your smile,
your laughter,
have brought me back to the light side.

loving you,
makes me feels lively again.

a new day again

7 in the morning,
awake on my bed,
sound of the rain drops,
makes me felt sleepy.

a new day has begun,
indicating, time flies,
hoping that time could stop,
cause i, was not prepared for exam,

all the,
tension,
stress,
is gone after adv maths test,
but,
phy A and phy B will reignite the stress and tension.

Blog reading kills

its been a while since i blog and read blog,
today, i decided to just take a look at a few blogs,
well,
i dint know why and how,
when i was reading "some1's" blog(sorry cant mention the name),
i felt jealous, jealous that u might like him,
my heart, feels the pain, although i tried to be more optimistik,
i felt jealousy, i couldnt tell is it whether i had already fallen for you or what?
it just keeps bothering me,
to an extend, i might alrd fallen for you without even realising,
its like, i felt really happy with u by my side,
u could really cheer me up,
its like, everytime ur by my side, i feel so happy and lively(even when im in a bad mood)
and right now i felt really hurt and jealous when im reading your blog,
i not sure whether is it that im really in love with you or not,
but i guess i could tell, i might had a lil feelings for u.

in memorials of lala(my gerbil)

                               lala(left),kiki(right)
today just came back from kuantan,
lala was found dead in the cage but luckily kiki was still alive.

me and my family is very sad for lala's death
it was unexpected.
however, whats done is done, lala is gone and is never coming back
may lala rest in peace

IN MEMORIALS OF:

LALA

a new life

my life will be getting better and better,
it is what i told my subconscious mind,
it is now time, for me to retake over control of my subconscious mind.

well...

i guess,
i have to just gave up hope,
i dont want to think anything else,
i dont want to continue my love life,
its much more suffering than i thought it would be,

i, never regretted loving you,
i will try my best to forget you,
although i might be sad for a very long time,
but its worth it.

is it really me?

i've start reading your blog again,
this time, i dint get hurt while reading it,
the changes that you have made,in your blog,
made me wonder again,
is it really me?
that you were writing about.

i did try to forget you,
but, as always,
failed to do so,
eveything about you,
just etched in my memory so deeply,
i really hope,
it was me your writing about.

give me a sign,
if its me,
just give me a sign.

The revive..

*beep* *beep*
heart starts beating again.
this blog has come to life again..